Open
by TheSilentPen
Summary: 'I promise babe... It'll all change... Just wait a little longer.'  Rachel and Quinn are in a secret relationship. Rachel wants to be open, but Quinn doesn't want to come out.


**Disclaimer:** I don't own Glee or any of its characters.

**A/N:** Hello, I am TheSilentPen. This is my second Faberry fic, and also my second Glee fic. This story is one that I believe some can relate to. The 'secret' relationship. One person in the relationship is ready to fully commit, the other is scared, timid, and unwilling. They don't want to go public because they're worried of what someone else will say. Well... At one point, you have to worry more about yourself and what you want to do than what your partner wants... why commit to someone who is **ashamed** of you? In this case, Rachel is open and willing, Quinn is unwilling. Please read and review. :)

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**Open**

_TheSilentPen_

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I want to be open… to be honest.

I want her to be mine.

And I want everyone to _**know**_ it.

I've been dating Quinn Fabray for three months. Dating her behind closed doors, stealing kisses in empty hallways, holding hands in the safe comfort of her room.

Yet never has she done this before an audience. Never has she loved me or dated me in public.

She's too scared to.

We've gone on dates before, sure. But never truly as we are.

Instead, the moments we spend in public together are 'forced.' The piles of study texts on the table between us act as an excuse. A mask.

She fails Chemistry, I tutor her begrudgingly.

A fitting cover… a fitting excuse to spend time with a loser like me.

Those moments are filled with snarls and insults. Of glares and hostile phrases that I cannot imagine I deserve.

Only in moments when others look away during our 'dates' does she throw a split second smile, an adoring gaze that remains reserved for my eyes alone.

But as soon as those moments… the time between secrecy and public elapses, her face transfigures from an adoring, heartwarming smile to a bitter, scornful gaze. She thrusts my hand away from hers, as though it is infected with some terrible parasite and mocks me endlessly.

In the hallways at school, she passes me with a smug smirk on her face, pushing me aside violently against my locker in the hallway snarling bitterly.

"_Out of the way, Man Hands!"_

_ "On your way to the loser convention, RuPaul?"_

_ "Going to an emergency nerd meeting, shortstack?"_

She'll flirt shamelessly with boys as I stand, watching from my locker or some other place. She'll draw pornographic images of me everywhere… swear she hates me to every living creature in the world, poor a slushy upside my head to garner attention.

Yet despite this treatment, I remain steadfast. Firm in my resolve.

Why?

Because of the sweet, honeyed lies she tells me.

I'll confront her about this issue. Tell her that I want to love her without worrying what anyone else things. Tell her that I _want_ everyone to know and that it can't work if she doesn't come out and commit herself to me.

And she'll look at me, hazel eyes shining with some unspoken tears, emerald flecks shimmering into pools of dark chocolate. She'll bite her cherry red lips, look down with those magnificent eyes as a curtain of blonde hair falls over delicate, goddess-carved features as a timid, beautiful voice speaks brokenly.

"_I promise, babe… It'll all change… Just wait a little longer."_

Then she'll look at me, kiss me gently against my cheek, and hold me to her chest gently. I'll forget, so charmed by the warmth of her embrace, the false sincerity shining in her voice, and the smell of cinnamon sugar wafting to my nose.

And then the cycle will start again, ceaselessly.

But now…

Now, I need to do something for myself.

I need to end all of this. I need to stop waiting for someone who doesn't want to commit. To someone who isn't as brave as I am…

To someone who is a hypocrite.

And that's why I'm standing right here at her bedside in the hospital, releasing her hand and watching her beg… _plead_ for me not to leave her.

She's promising again. Promising change, promising the _**openness**_I so desperately crave for. Her hazel eyes shining with tears as she holds my hand as though it's the last she'll see me. Kissing it reverently, adoringly…

Beseechingly.

And I almost give in… _**Almost**_**.**

But just as I'm about to accept her again, I remember how this cycle goes.

I know I'm the one who will end up played again.

So I harden my heart and pull away from her, brown eyes hardening instantly as I tell her the biggest lie I've told anyone.

"_I don't love you anymore. You're a waste of my time"_

I can see her heart shatter in tandem with mine. I can see that I've broken her.

Yet I cannot feel anymore… I can only look at her stoically.

I can only do what's right for me.

A piercing cry draws me back to reality.

I look into the corner… I see the little scrap of humanity in the corner, bawling ceaselessly. Crying for attention and love.

And I envy the creature.

She gets more love… more honesty… more openness in these few moments in her life than I who have been there for so long before her. She, the tiny bit of existence once loathed by my love has more of it in mere moments than I have in the last few months.

And I know it's over then.

"_Goodbye Quinn_."

I leave.

…And I don't look back.

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**A/N:** I hope you all enjoyed that. I'm actually working on a multi-chapter Faberry. But the first chapter isn't coming out quite as I want it to yet... I hope you'll all want to read that :)

Thanks so much, please review, critique, etc.


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